When The Police Dangles Its Carrot

 By Banji Ojewale

A child stands before a disciplinarian parent he has wronged. There’s considerably safe distance between them. The child could flee if a whip magically leaps into the hands of the offended. But there’s no cane at the moment with the man who is never seen without the opa, (baton). The young fellow sees something else with the man staring at him: a basket of assorted fruits and sweets. He’s inviting him to come closer to take his pick: fresh fruits or sweets? No cane on offer. The lad is surveying the surroundings.

Something isn’t adding up. A rod hidden somewhere? Is the basket a Trojan horse? The older man breaks the ice. He throws his arms wide open, and swings around 360 degrees to assure the calculating boy he has no malevolent agenda. This is fair and transparent, the boy concludes. So, he moves gingerly into the free hands of the man he has always known as the unforgiving rod man. What follows is a feast, a dialogue and the creation of a new world to banish the cat-and-mouse relationship between them.

Obasanjo Foisted Presidentialism On Nigeria; He’s Still Defending The Indefensible!

 By Olu Fasan

As they prepared to return Nigeria to civilian rule in 1979, the military regime, led by General Murtala Muhammed and later by General Olusegun Obasanjo, set up a 49-man committee to draft a new constitution for Nigeria. However, the regime gave the “49 wise men” a red line: they must not return Nigeria to the parliamentary system, practised after independence from 1960 to 1966. Instead, they should adopt the American-style presidential system. After General Murtala’s assassination in 1976, General Obasanjo took over as head of state and put his imprimatur on the draft constitution, inserting nearly 20 amendments.

*Obasanjo 

So, the 1979 Constitution lied when it ascribed itself to “We the people of Nigeria.” In truth, it was Obasanjo’s military regime, aided by a few civilian elites, that imposed the constitution and the presidential system on Nigeria. Today, over 40 years after Nigeria first practised the system, and despite its patent flaws and unsuitability for Nigeria, Obasanjo is still defending it.

Hurrah For Admiral Madueke! The Cat With Nine Lives Is 80 Years Old Today

By Chuks Iloegbunam

An Igbo saying goes like this: If a man’s chi (personal god) is not a party to the scheme, death will not kill him. On the morning of July 30, 1966, Midshipman Alison Madueke, boarded a KLM, Royal Dutch Airline plane for London, via Amsterdam.

He was on his way to officer training at the Britannia Royal Naval College in Devon, England. The plane started taxiing for takeoff. But midway, as it gathered speed, the attempt was aborted. The pilot addressed the passengers through the intercom: “This is the captain speaking. Will the three Naval officers flying to London please alight? They are wanted by the military authorities.” Down on the tarmac, Alison was seized and manhandled by Northern Nigerian military officers and men. The July 29, 1966 countercoup, the bloodiest putsch in African history, was underway.

Nigerians Dying Like Flies Hit By Broom

 By Dele Sobowale

“Many people sold their boys and girls for a little rice…Hunger stalked us…People of all ages began to die….Everyone had to live with half-empty stomachs …People started looting, searching for food” – Bijoykrishna, survivor of the Bengal famine in 1943 (BBC, February 23, 2023)

*Tinubu

The old man talking is reported to be 102 years old and one of the few survivors of the famine which killed millions in Bengal while World War II raged on around them. The savagery of the war and extremely bad weather resulted in horrible harvests. Suddenly, parents were “eating” their kids. Or what do you call selling your children to buy food? It happened in Bengal in 1943; it can happen anywhere – including Nigeria.

Governance Is Not Rocket Science

 By Owei Lakemfa

Governance is not about sharing blame, making excuses, or the individual exonerating himself. It is about getting the job done.

*Tinubu

So, when in the face of serious financial and economic crises which have seen hunger envelop the land like a shroud and the national currency waterboarded, Olayemi Michael “Yemi” Cardoso, the Central Bank of Nigeria, CBN, Governor exonerates himself, something serious must be wrong.

Why Tinubu’s Policy Adventures Will Fail

 By Charles Onunaiju

President Bola Tinubu and his administration bask in the euphoria that they have taken some “tough” and “courageous” measures that would deliver prosperity to Nigerians in the future. The coordinating minister of the economy, Mr Wale Edun, recently stated that despite public uproar at the harshness of the measures and their devastating impact on the lives of Nigerians, along with the more frightening dimension of security meltdown, the administration has been receiving accolades at several international forums, including the World Bank, IMF, and the G20 meetings.

*Tinubu

However, it is not because the measures are tough, courageous, and may have attracted accolades from outside that they may fail to produce any result close to prosperity, but because they are extraneous and largely disconnected from the existential reality of the current condition of the country. The choice of the word “measures” to denote government response is deliberate, even as it is widely called policy.

Nigeria: Hunger And Anger In The Land!

 By Kenneth Okonkwo

Jesus Christ was persecuted, assaulted, dehumanised, and eventually crucified for mankind. As he was dying on the cross, he raised his voice and shouted, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do”. This same Jesus, when he was hungry and came to the living thing which God had created to give food to mankind and found no food on the living thing, he was angry and cursed the tree, and it died. He forgave his killers, but couldn’t forgive hunger.  

Indeed, even God knows that there’s no reception to theology when a man is hungry. James 2:15-17 was unequivocal when it states, “If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food, And one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what doth it profit? Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone”. The first thing to administer to a man who is hungry is food, not preaching, not verses of the Bible or Quran.

Buhari’s Integrity: From Attenuation To Total Wipe-Out!

 By Adekunle Adekoya

Time flies! And very fast too. In this space on September 24, 2021, the column carried a piece with the headline: “The attenuation of integrity.” Those who read between the lines would have discerned that it was a commentary directed at the nation’s head honcho at the time, a retired general known to the rest of us as Muhammadu Buhari.

*Buhari 

Buhari was sold to us in 2014-2015 as the very personification of integrity, which meant he was a man of his words who would do exactly as he said. During the electioneering whose main objective, as we can now see, was not to make life and living better and easier for me and you but to oust Dr Goodluck Jonathan and his PDP cohorts from power, Buhari was sold to us as the next best thing to happen to humanity in Nigeria outside the scriptures.

Remembering MKO Abiola’s Transformer Semiotics

 By Banji Ojewale

One of the captivating political campaign lines of MKO Abiola has been immortalized in a seminal work by Professor Tunde Ope-Davies (Tunde Opeibi) of the University of Lagos. Titled Discourse, Politics and the 1993 Presidential Election Campaign in Nigeria, the book documents the drive of the gladiators to secure the mandate of the electorate.

*Abiola 

Ope-Davies’ uncanny nose for hidden details smokes out Abiola’s rush for virtually every trick in the advertising books to outwit his main challenger, Bashir Tofa, of the National Republican Convention, NRC, leading Abiola to create the famous punchline on the transformer as a metaphor for abiding leadership. MKO, as he was fondly called, was of the Social Democratic Party, SDP. He is quoted by Ope-Davies (then known as Tunde Opeibi) as saying during his search for votes that all Nigeria needed to overcome its age-old statehood concerns was ‘one transformer’, one singular and enduring personality in the saddle whose beam of integrity would permeate all of society for salutary ripples in his days and beyond.

Shettima Goofs: No Forces Want To Pull Down Nigeria!

 By Olu Fasan

Ahead of last year’s general elections, I wrote a piece titled “2023: Shettima Unfit To Be Nigeria’s Vice-President” (Vanguard, September 22, 2022). I argued that despite his education and seeming bibliophilism, Kashim Shettima suffers from negative parrhesia, expressing indecorous views freely without aforethought.

*Shettima

I wrote: “With Shettima’s inherent tetchiness and truculence, he would be gratuitously provocative. And with his uncouthness and indiscretion, he would be utterly divisive and toxifying.” Well, since he became vice-president, Shettima has done enough, with several infuriating comments, to validate my opinion of him. 

Tinubu Must Find Dollars NOT Scapegoats!

 By Ugoji Egbujo

If they leave the major bleeding points oozing to fan the man because he is sweating, then they are like our government that has left crude oil thieves to chase BDC operators.

The country is in shock. Shock is what happens when circulation fails and systems start to shut down. Our country lies prostrate, bleating, like a man run over by a hit-and-run truck. Our foreign reserves are empty. The poor can’t buy food. The government is running helter-skelter to pander to the angry masses and save itself. Truth has been sacrificed. But that won’t do. So, scapegoats must be found. Perhaps, as the Igbo say, a desperate man is entitled to act a little crazy.  

Tinubu, Beware The Troubles Of March To May!

 By Dele Sobowale

“Caesar, beware, the ides of March” – William Shakespeare, 1546-1616

As Shakespeare rendered it, in his famous book, Julius Caesar, the Roman Emperor (Jagaban if you wish) was at the peak of his powers; without realising that a plot against him was in progress. A seer approached Caesar to warn the most powerful man on Earth then about impending danger. He was dismissed with a wave of the hand.

*Tinubu 

Then it happened and world history was changed forever. Don’t get me wrong. I am not predicting another assassination. But, all the signs of a major upheaval are already present in the Nigerian polity – as to make the next three months the most dangerous in our history since January 1966.

Silence In The East

 By Obi Nwakanma

A terrible time has fallen on Nigeria. There is no hiding it. Hunger is not just rampant; it is now an epidemic. There is a food crisis, and it is inevitably leading towards massive national food riots. However, a few weeks ago, a minister in the current government said that there was no scarcity of food in Nigeria. 

Well, I’m not quite certain about this minister, since most of Tinubu’s cabinet is made up of second rate, mediocre, provincial types – but elementary economics theory of scarcity connects with a price theory which is determined by the dynamics of supply and demand. Equilibrium occurs when the rise in supply meets the rise in demand. But disequilibrium happens too. This, when the demand for the resource outstrips the supply, and it leads both to exclusion, and to scarcity.

Bola Tinubu Should Resign!

 By Casmir Igbokwe

Three videos which trended on the social media last week brought home the current reality of life in Nigeria. The first one happens to be a group of young women struggling to scoop rice from the pot of a rice vendor in Maiduguri, the Borno State capital. The big pot of rice was still on fire, steaming hot. But the women were not bothered with fire or any other thing. All they wanted was to quench the fire of hunger ravaging their stomachs.

*Tinubu

In the second video, a group of people, mainly youths, were struggling to collect loaves of bread said to be N100 each. It was on February 14, 2024, being Valentine’s Day. As the youths were pushing and shoving one another, the organisers, who had a tough time controlling them, resorted to whipping them to be orderly. This particular incident reportedly happened on Lagos Island.

Nigeria: The Road To Hunger Land

 By Adekunle Adekoya

There is a point you get to talking about the problems facing our dear nation that you just get tired. This is because the problems seem endless — from insecurity to unending rise in the prices of goods and services, especially food items, to the parlous state of our infrastructure, especially roads and electricity. In the midst of unreliable power supply, government is bidding to remove subsidy on electricity, which, from where I stand, amounts to making the people pay more for a service that they get just a whiff of.

Right now, methinks the greatest problem that we have to deal with is the growing issue of food insecurity; more able-bodied men are finding it herculean to put food on the table as the prices of staples — rice, garri, yams, beans, potatoes, others are becoming more unaffordable every day. That is in addition to sky-high prices of bread, fish, meat, pepper, tomato, onions and other groceries. But, with regards to food, it was clear, albeit a long time ago, that we will get to this point someday. Just that those in charge of our affairs continued to deceive us and themselves that all is well.

Insecurity: Nigeria Needs Regional Police, Not State Police

 By Olu Fasan

Recently, faced with escalating violence across Nigeria, the president, Bola Tinubu, reportedly agreed with state governors to establish state police. The news excited those calling for state police in Nigeria. But the agitation for state police is misguided; it is based on shallow reasoning, not on a rational, hard-nosed analysis of the potential consequences. 

To be sure, Nigeria cannot continue to have a unitary police force that purports to “police” the entire country with orders from Abuja. Equally, however, Nigeria cannot have a mushrooming of ramshackle state “police forces”. What Nigeria needs is formidable regional police with extensive reach across a region. Truth is, in the Nigerian context, the advantages of regional police far outweigh those of state police.

Tinubu And The Troubled House Of Lugard

 By Sola Ebiseni

Football tournaments should be held every day, continuously, ad infinitum; it is one surest opium by which the poor and needy are sweetly distracted from their life’s agony and anguish. Ensure that the Eagles, whether Golden Eaglets, Flying, Falcons or Super are involved, showing predatory capacities and see the Nigerian hoi polloi willingly sedated by a large dose of the round-leather tranquilliser.

So it was with this season’s AFCON which momentarily shifted attention from the common effects of the sloppy Naira and galloping fuel to the boys in Cote d’Ivoire. While the fiesta and its razzmatazz lasted, no one cared about the tribes of our young ambassadors on the field.

Nigeria: Renewed Wailing!

 By Ochereome Nnanna

Femi Adesina, Muhammadu Buhari’s star-struck admirer who later got employed by the Daura politician when he achieved his presidential ambition in 2015, left us with a number of acidic soundbites as a presidential spokesman. Two of them stood out.

*Bola Tinubu

The first was not exactly a soundbite, but was summarised for him into that by his colleagues in the media. Reacting to the Fulani herdsmen terrorism which his boss, Buhari, allowed (some say he facilitated it and protected the culprits with his presidential powers), Adesina shocked Nigerians with his coldblooded dismissiveness of the massacres, displacement and occupation of farming communities by the invaders.

Nigeria Is On The Road To Haiti, Not Venezuela

 By Owei Lakemfa

The Nigerian masses are troubled. They are hungry, angry and losing faith in civil rule. The times call for leaders at all levels to be at work, seeking solutions. Unfortunately, many government officials are spending scarce resources and precious time carrying out propaganda.

The political traders blaming the demonstrably inept and kleptocratic Buhari regime, for our current woes, are engaged in a needless diversion. It is like beating a dead horse; what would the country gain from such waste of time and energy?

President Tinubu, Scarcity Is Evident; Chaos Follows

 By Dele Sobowale

“Love and business and family and religion and art and patriotism are nothing but shadows of words when a man is starving” – O’Henry, 1862-1910.

*Tinubu 
About two weeks ago, your Vice President called Nigerians, who registered their displeasure about the continuing devaluation of the Naira, “clowns” for not supporting the government now when things are tough. Shettima has forgotten that he begged for the job. If he can’t stand the heat, he should resign. But, he cannot be insulting his employers. He was joined by one Felix Morka, the National Publicity Secretary of the All Progressives Congress (APC), who apparently has no relatives, friend or town’s men feeling the pain of hunger. The two, like all the “Yes-men and women” of your administration, are leading your government down the path which destroyed Buhari and others before you.