Bayo Onanuga’s Slimy Mud-Bath

 By Ochereome Nnanna

For his own purposes, President Bola Tinubu had delayed the appointment of Bayo Onanuga as one of his spokesmen. Ajuri Ngelale, broadcast journalist and Ogoni chief, was presented to give Tinubu’s media office a handsome, though unsmiling face.

*Peter Obi 

Many commentators were relieved that elements like Bayo Onanuga, Dele Alake and Festus Keyamo would not be brought to irritate the nerves of decent Nigerians with their tawdry, noisy and cheap propaganda antics which we saw during the campaigns for the 2023 general elections in Tinubu’s camp. This feeling was further reinforced when Alake was posted to the Solid Minerals Ministry and Keyamo taken to Aviation.

Tinubu’s Ministers: A Bunch Of Political Rewardees And Cronies

 By Olu Fasan

One of the popular myths around Bola Tinubu, stemming from his time as governor of Lagos State, was that he had an uncanny ability to pick competent teams of technocrats to run the affairs of state. Indeed, some genuinely wanted Tinubu to be president and “run Nigeria as he ran Lagos.” But the myths have busted since he became president. Not only has he muddled through policy after policy, the famed gift for talent-spotting gravely eluded him as he unveiled a middling cast of ministers, characterised by two fundamental flaws. 

*Tinubu 

First, Tinubu will have the largest cabinet in Nigeria’s political history. With 48 ministers and over 20 special advisers and senior special assistants, with cabinet-level status, Tinubu will have the most bloated and unwieldy cabinet of any past president.

As Tinubu Intensifies War Against The South-East

 By Ikechukwu Amaechi

On Monday, August 7, the Senate confirmed 45 of the 48 ministerial nominees sent to it by President Bola Tinubu. Surprisingly, it deferred the confirmation of three nominees – former governor of Kaduna State, Nasir el-Rufai; a former senator from Taraba, Sani Danladi; and a nominee from Delta State, Stella Okotete – because of undisclosed security concerns.

*Tinubu 

Tinubu transmitted the names of the 48 nominees in three separate correspondences to the Senate on July 28, August 3 and August 4, the last list containing the names of Mr. Festus Keyamo, former Minister of State for Labour and Employment from Delta State and Dr. Mariya Mahmoud, a replacement for Dr. Maryam Shetty, whose nomination was withdrawn. Many Nigerians are perplexed at the development because nominees ought to have scaled the security hurdle before coming to the Senate. Does it mean that the Department of State Services, DSS, and other security agencies did not do due diligence?

Fascists? Look No Further Than The Ruling Party

 By Olu Fasan

As a creative writing scholar at Oxford University, I have been reviewing the legendary literature Nobel laureate Professor Wole Soyinka’s latest book Chronicles from the land of the happiest people on earth. Reading the book, a political fiction, I’m enthralled by its linguistic and literary quality. Imagine my bafflement, therefore, when Professor Soyinka recently used the word “fascistic” to describe Dr. Datti Baba-Ahmed, vice-presidential candidate of Labour Party in February’s presidential election.

What drew Professor Soyinka’s ire was Dr Baba-Ahmed’s controversial interview on Channels TV. “Whoever swears in Mr Tinubu has ended democracy in Nigeria,” he said, adding: “Mr President, do not hold that inauguration. CJN (Chief Justice of Nigeria), your lordship, do not partake in unconstitutionality.” Baba-Ahmed argued that Bola Tinubu “has not met the requirements of the law”, having failed to secure 25 per cent of the votes cast in Abuja.

Soyinka, Chimamanda And Other Burning Issues

 By Valentine Obienyem

The last election in Nigeria was the worst in its electoral history. Have you asked yourself why it was only APC and Sen. Ahmed Bola Tinubu that failed to condemn non-transmission of results from the polling booths to the central server even before the results were announced? The election has created  deep divisions among Nigerians, who belong to diverse ethnic and religious groups because Tinubu charged his supporters to secure victory for him by any means possible. Alas, we have seen how his followers used the ethnic and religious card, Ayo masquerade festival, guns, cudgels, threats, and psychological warfare to secure unmerited victory for him.

*Soyinka and Chimamanda 

 

The unconscionable  action of Tinubu was a clear example of his readiness to bring Nigeria down owing to his vaulting  political ambition. The practical disfranchisement of Nigerians had removed the mental stimulus that comes from free political activity and a widespread sense of liberty and power.

Nigeria: DSS Can’t Afford Frivolity

 By Amanze Obi

The other day, the Department of State Services (DSS) had cause to talk tough. It said through a press statement that there was a plot by some Nigerians for the installation of an interim government at the end of President Muhammadu Buhari’s tenure on May 29. The service said it has uncovered those behind the burgeoning scheme. It frowned seriously on the plot and warned those behind it to retrace their steps.

The reaction from the DSS was predictable. It was its immediate response to the petition brought before it by one of the defenders of Bola Tinubu’s contentious election victory, Festus Keyamo. The Tinubu apologist had alleged that the presidential candidate of the Labour Party in the February 25 election, Mr. Peter Obi, and his running mate, Festus Keyamo were promoting insurrection and civil disobedience. Keyamo asked the DSS to arrest them and charge them for incitement and treasonable felony.

The DSS: An Intelligence Agency Or An Arm Of A Campaign

By Charles Ogbu

On March 29, 2023, the Department of State Services, DSS, claimed to have identified some political actors involved in a plot to install an interim government. According to the statement signed by Peter Afunanya, the spokesperson of the Spy Agency, the plot is “not only an aberration but a mischievous way to set aside the Constitution and undermine civil rule as well as plunge the country into an avoidable crisis”. 

The Service identified “endless violent mass protests in major cities” and “frivolous court injunctions to forestall the inauguration of the new executive administrations…..” as the two means through which the unnamed politicians planned to achieve their aim. 

Tinubu Vs Atiku: A Cautionary Tale Of Self-Destruction

 By Dan Onwukwe

Like a broken family whose members would  prefer to destroy their father’s inheritance rather than share it, shame has become a passé to the managers of the Presidential candidates of the All Progressives Congress and that of the Peoples Democratic Party, Bola Ahmed Tinubu and Atiku Abubakar. As the Feb 25 Presidential and National Assembly elections draw feverishly near, the desperation in the camps of these two presidential candidates seems to have reached a new low.

*Atiku and Tinubu 

With the many gaffes and seeming lack of tact by Tinubu on the campaign hustings, a sense of ennui has set in. His desperate efforts to be the next President of Nigeria appear to be bogging down. But he keeps blowing hot. As respected columnist Sonala Olumhense wrote in the SUNDAY PUNCH of January 29, if there’s one political party that ought not to be on the ballot in the February/March elections, it’s the ruling APC.  

Tinubu As President? Buhari Must Really Hate Nigeria!

 By Olu Fasan

Ahead of the 1993 presidential election, General Ibrahim Babangida, the then military head of state, made a profound statement. He said: “I don’t know who will succeed me, but I know who will not.” Sadly, that statement panned out with the annulment of the June 12, 1993 presidential election. Yet, in principle, it was a perfectly reasonable statement. 

*Buhari and Tinubu 

Here’s why. If General Babangida had damaging intelligence on MKO Abiola, the presumed winner of the election, an intelligence that could bring international shame on Nigeria, he had a duty to stop him from running for president. 

Nigeria: Still On The Same Faith Ticket

 By Olu Fasan

Every well-meaning Nigerian must remain outraged by the choice of a Muslim-Muslim ticket by Alhaji Bola Ahmed Tinubu, the presidential candidate of All Progressives Congress, APC. Every patriotic Nigerian should be appalled by the utter insensitivity and perniciousness of the calculated decision that belittles Christianity and puts religious harmony and internal cohesion at greater risk in Nigeria. Of course, the issue won’t go away; we will discuss it until next year’s elections. My focus here is the symbolism of the choice. 

*Tinubu and Shettima 

Self-servingly, some have mischaracterised the opposition to the Muslim-Muslim ticket. Recently, Festus Keyamo, the Minister of State for Labour and Employment and spokesman of the Tinubu presidential campaign, said it was about “balance of power”. According to him, Christians feared losing power at the centre if Tinubu became president with Kashim Shettima, a fellow Muslim, as his vice-president. He said this was misguided because the vice-president “is powerless”. 

Nigeria: A Season Of Political Malapropisms

 By Chidi Odinkalu

Politics in Nigeria is largely of the transhumant variety. It is not defined by any big ideas. With the exception of perhaps the late Chief Obafemi Awolowo, Nigerian politicians have been largely devoid of clear ideological moorings.

Freed as such from the forces of ideological gravity, the only impetus that they respond to for the most part is from the stomach. Gravity in Nigerian politics tends to be a force defined by the imperative of human grazing.

An opposition may be essential for democracy to thrive but no Nigerian politician or party wants to linger in that neighbourhood. In power for 16 years at the centre, the Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, has been an abject failure since it went into opposition in 2015, unable to articulate any alternatives to the unmitigated disaster that has been the government of the All Progressives Congress, APC. Both parties are separated by a revolving door.

Tinubu As President? Buhari Must Really Hate Nigeria!

 By Olu Fasan

Ahead of the 1993 presidential election, General Ibrahim Babangida, the then military head of state, made a profound statement. He said: “I don’t know who will succeed me, but I know who will not.” Sadly, that statement panned out with the annulment of the June 12, 1993 presidential election. Yet, in principle, it was a perfectly reasonable statement. 

*Buhari and Tinubu

Here’s why. If General Babangida had damaging intelligence on MKO Abiola, the presumed winner of the election, an intelligence that could bring international shame on Nigeria, he had a duty to stop him from running for president. 

Babangida’s eternal mistake, assuming he had such intelligence, was to allow Abiola to run, encourage Nigerians to vote and then annul the election. But there was nothing wrong with saying “I don’t know who will succeed me, but I know who will not,” provided it was in the national interest. Of course, in a democracy, a president cannot simply say: “I know who will not succeed me.” But a president should signal a nation’s values.

Muslim-Muslim Ticket: Christianity Would Suffer At Nigeria’s Seat Of Sovereignty

 By Olu Fasan 

Every well-meaning Nigerian must remain outraged by the choice of a Muslim-Muslim ticket by Alhaji Bola Ahmed Tinubu, the presidential candidate of All Progressives Congress, APC. Every patriotic Nigerian should be appalled by the utter insensitivity and perniciousness of the calculated decision that belittles Christianity and puts religious harmony and internal cohesion at greater risk in Nigeria. Of course, the issue won’t go away; we will discuss it until next year’s elections. My focus here is the symbolism of the choice. 

*Shettima, Tinubu

Self-servingly, some have mischaracterised the opposition to the Muslim-Muslim ticket. Recently, Festus Keyamo, a minister of state for labour and employment and spokesman of the Tinubu presidential campaign, said it was about “balance of power”. According to him, Christians feared losing power at the centre if Tinubu became president with Kashim Shettima, a fellow Muslim, as his vice-president. He said this was misguided because the vice-president “is powerless”.

Muslim-Muslim Ticket: Christianity Would Suffer At Nigeria’s Seat Of Sovereignty

 By Olu Fasan

Every well-meaning Nigerian must remain outraged by the choice of a Muslim-Muslim ticket by Alhaji Bola Ahmed Tinubu, the presidential candidate of All Progressives Congress, APC. Every patriotic Nigerian should be appalled by the utter insensitivity and perniciousness of the calculated decision that belittles Christianity and puts religious harmony and internal cohesion at greater risk in Nigeria. Of course, the issue won’t go away; we will discuss it until next year’s elections. My focus here is the symbolism of the choice.

Self-servingly, some have mischaracterised the opposition to the Muslim-Muslim ticket. Recently, Festus Keyamo, a minister of state for labour and employment and spokesman of the Tinubu presidential campaign, said it was about “balance of power”. 

According to him, Christians feared losing power at the centre if Tinubu became president with Kashim Shettima, a fellow Muslim, as his vice-president. He said this was misguided because the vice-president “is powerless”.

EU Election Report: Straight From Janus!

By Banji Ojewale

Janus was the Roman mythological god that had two faces, front and back. One looked backwards into the past, with the other gazing forward into the future. Heaven help you if you lost your way and ran into Janus at a crossroads. He would blight your plight. For, his mien would indicate two directions, when all you required was one to lead you to your destination. But alas the ancient Romans celebrated this god of guile, elevating him as inspirer of ‘’auspicious beginnings.’’ That’s how the month of January was imposed on us in honour of Janus.

And that is what the European Union Election Observer Mission, EU EOM, that came for Nigeria’s 2019 poll has given the nation: a report with two deceptive sides. The document has been hailed and contemned by the country’s two major political parties, All Progressives Congress, APC, and Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, suggesting that there are two angles, each suiting or damning one side or the other. You go home with what gratifies you and drop that which offends. Yet it’s one report.

President Buhari And The Arrogance Of Power

By Anthony Igiehon

Ahead of the 58th quadrennial United States presidential election on November 8, 2016, the world watched with bated breath as the two major candidates in the election, Republican Candidate Donald Trump and Democratic Candidate Hillary Clinton went head to head at three separate debates held at New York’s Hofstra University (September 26, 2016), Washington University in St. Louis (October 9, 2016), and University of Nevada, Las Vegas (October 19, 2016).

*President Buhari 

For the two candidates who met the Commission on Presidential Debates’ criteria for participation, the debates provided a much-needed platform to present to the American voting public their plans or reform proposals on a number of foreign and domestic issues.

President Buhari, Show Us Your Certificate!

By Reno Omokri
Nothing could prepare me for the shock that greeted me when I opened the dailies on Friday, October 26, 2018. Right there on the front-page headlines was the news that President Buhari, again, could not present his West African School Certificate Examination certificate because the original is with the army. 

*President Buhari and his wife, Aisha

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me! That lame excuse could hardly suffice in 2015 when President Jonathan was the Commander-in-Chief of the Army, but it is certainly an untenable excuse today!

Apostle Suleman Writes Keyamo, Demands 1 Billion Naira Damages

*Apostle Suleman

Apostle Johnson Suleman's letter to the Festus Keyamo Chambers is reproduced below: 

Festus  Keyamo  Esq,

Festus Keyamo Chambers

Anthony  Village, Maryland, Lagos.

Sir,

Allegation Of Professional Misconduct And Unethical Practices.

Sequel to our letter to you dated 6th March, 2017, we have observed with shock and dismay your deliberate and relentless efforts to malign and convict our client, Apostle Johnson Suleman, through media trial.

By your relentless media campaign, you are conducting yourself in a manner inconsistent with S.1 of the Rules of Professional Conduct For Legal Practitioners 2007. Instead of gathering your facts and evidence before a court of competent jurisdiction for adjudication you have cleverly resorted to blackmail and intimidation of our client through the media – both traditional and social media. In short, you have threatened and indeed executed your threat of conjuring, manufacturing and synthesizing bogus and unverifiable exhibits in the social media and newspapers, all with a view to poison public opinion against our client and reduce his esteem and reputation in the eye of any reasonable man. Your attitude is also to ambush a fair trial while litigation is anticipated. This is contrary to S.33 of the Rules of Professional Conduct For Legal Practitioners 2007.

In the Punch newspapers of Tuesday, March 7, 2017 Vol. 41 No 21,388 page 10, you were quoted in an interview threatening to “release more bullets.” You said your client under your supervision will be organizing a world press conference and “we will begin to release bullets.”

Furthermore, you grossly and recklessly maligned our client, saying, “these men of God are not what they claim to be, we have a duty to protect the public. Many of them are fake and fraudsters. You will see the video very soon in the next few minutes.” True to your threat of trial publicity stunts, the video clips have flooded the social media networks.

Budget 2017 On Our Mind

By Saatah Nubari

The first time this budget analysis series ran was for the 2016 budget; and it becomes visible each day that the 1810-page document was a horrid, hurriedly-put, corrupt-conduit-filled piece of executive cluelessness. Well, since I’m more of a realist than any of the other-ists, I’ll just say that the fact that the world lost an entire tree to the making of the paper it was inked on is a tragedy. We have been given a sequel.

 

*Buhari presenting the 2017 Budget 

The 2017 budget was presented to the National Assembly by the President in the presence of the ministers who drafted it – and even slept while the presentation was on – and it was called the “Budget of Recovery and Growth.” If you noticed, it is quite a change from the previous budget of change just like the government’s change mantra. Here are some quotes from the President’s speech on what when passed, will be arguably the most important document in the country – sorry, just checked and it is 63 paragraphs long so I will just skip to analysing the 2017 budget as we await the implementation report of the 2016 budget.

The 2017 budget is N7.298 trillion. According to the government, this comprises
i. Statutory transfers of N419.02 billion;
ii. Debt service of N1.66 trillion;
iii. Sinking fund of N177.46 billion to retire certain maturing bonds;
iv. Non-debt recurrent expenditure of N2.98 trillion; and
v. Capital expenditure of N2.24 trillion (including capital in Statutory Transfers).

We will begin with the State House budget, which is, N42,917,666,214. This almost doubles what the previous government budgeted for this in 2015 which was N23,465,865,117. Out of this, N19,970,000,000 is the total capital budget while the total recurrent budget stands at N22,947,666,214. The total overhead is 10,171,082,268 and that for total personnel is N12,776,583,946.

This is the first piece in the #SaatahBudgetSeries2017, and I will be looking at the budget of the State House (which was referred to as Presidency in previous budgets).

STATE HOUSE
There are 16 agencies under the State House, and they are: State House Headquarters, The Office of the President, The Office of the Vice President, Office of the Chief of Staff to the President, Office of the Chief Security Officer to the President, State House Medical Centre, State House Lagos Liaison Office, Office of the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Sustainable Development Goals(SDGS), National Institute for Policy and Strategic Studies(NIPSS). Kuru, Bureau of Public Enterprises, National Emergency Management Agency, Economic and Financial Crimes Commission, Bureau of Public Procurement, Nigeria Extractive Industries Transparency Initiative, Nigeria Atomic Energy Commission and its centres, and Office of the Chief Economic Adviser to the President which funny enough the President only appointed in August of this year.

The first piece of shit I was hit with, ironically, was the “Sewage Charges” budget of the State House Headquarters. It was put at N52,827,800. That means N144,733 every day. That’s a lot of shit as far as the eye can see. Compare this with the “Sewage Charge” budget for 2015 which was N4,957,143 and for 2016 which was N6,121,643. This simply means the shit charge went up by 1050% comparedwith the 2015 budget, and 850% when compared with the 2016 budget. The N52,827,800 question I want to ask now is what exactly are they shitting there?

The State House Headquarters budget for “Honorarium/Sitting Allowance” is N556,592,736. Let me remind you that the previous government budgeted N174,471,371 for same item in 2015, while in 2016, this administration jacked it up to N507,518, 861. 

Audu’s Death Created Strange And Novel Constitutional Scenario

By Festus Keyamo

The reported death on Sunday, November 22nd, 2015, of the APC candidate in the Kogi State Governorship elections, Prince Abubakar Audu, is extremely shocking and sad. I would like to express my condolences to the entire family of Audu and to the people of Kogi State. However, the real question agitating the minds of everybody is the legal implication regarding the inconclusive Governorship elections at the time of his demise.

 Late Prince Abubakar Audu
To state it correctly he was said to have died AFTER the announcement of the results by INEC and after INEC had declared the elections inconclusive. Admittedly, this is a strange and novel constitutional scenario. It has never happened in our constitutional history to the extent that when an election has been partially conducted (and not before or after the elections) a candidate dies. What then happens? This is a hybrid situation between what happened in the case of Atiku Abubakar/Boni Haruna in 1999 and the provision of section 33 of the Electoral Act, 2010.

In the case of Atiku Abubakar/Boni Haruna [which is now a clear constitutional provision of section 181(1) of the 1999 Constitution (as amended)] the Supreme Court held, in effect, that “if a person duly elected as Governor dies before taking and subscribing the Oath of Allegiance and oath of office, or is unable for any reason whatsoever to be sworn in, the person elected with him as Deputy governor shall be sworn in as Governor and he shall nominate a new Deputy-Governor who shall be appointed by the Governor with the approval of a simple majority of the house of Assembly of the State”.