How Not To Spoil The Female Child

By Udodilim B. Ijeoma

The role of woman in life can’t be over emphasized. Her womb houses her fellow creature for nine months and, under a laborious process, delivers him. She nurtures him until he matures to tread his own path. He is very close to the mother than to the father. In the light of this, he is easily influenced by the mother. Much of what he learns or does is credited to the mother.

(*pix: Ventures Africa)

A good mother transforms her home into paradise for her family and other people with whom she comes into contact. Under a good woman, the wider environment blossoms in all endeavours. A female child develops into a woman. The entire society will swim in an ocean of bliss if the female child is brought up responsibly. Otherwise, sorrow and catastrophe will be the order of the day

To bring up the female child in the most responsible manner several factors are inextricably involved. As the first social unit she comes into contact with, the family sets the ball rolling. Sexual promiscuity which exists in some families today should stop so that the child will not have the impression that it is the normal way of life. The couple should keep their marriage vows by being faithful to each other under any situation. Also bitter quarrels that can degenerate into flexing of muscles should be avoided.

Certain discussions that are exclusively meant for adults should not be handled in the presence of the child. The parents should have eagle eyes to ensure that she does not associate with bad eggs that can shape her life negatively. Many girls have become so loose and wild owing to the influence of their friends. She should not be allowed to have access to sophisticated phones capable of exposing her to the nefarious activities in the world. The elder brother or sister should shun immoral lifestyles and the habit of sending her on an errand that can lure her into doing nefarious things such as calling his girlfriend or boyfriend.

Most teachers are like the proverbial dog that ate up the bone hung around its neck for protection. They teach the female children immoral things and sometimes turn them into objects of practical. The child should be sent to a school where there is moral discipline. Added to this is the nauseating activities which occur in the name of attending extra mural classes. The children wear their choices of clothes especially the ones that attract men to them. Some of them end up in their boyfriends’ homes in the name of attending lesson as they call it. If parents must allow them attend lesson, they should strictly monitor them. Their books should be constantly checked with a view to knowing how they fare. Also, they should be made to always dress responsibly. In this regard, the mother should set the ball rolling by shunning all forms of immoral dressing which is the order of the day. A woman who dresses well commands the respect and honour of other people irrespective of her status.

It is indisputable that immorality has crept into the church. We hear stories of how some pastors and other highly respected men in the church defile their female members in the name of attending all night service, bible study, choir practice, youth meeting, Sunday school preparatory class and others. The child should know that all that glitters is not gold. There are many devourers in the vineyard of the Lord so she should be wary of them. The parents should open their eyes and ears widely. If attending those programmes will translate into a curse instead of blessings then it is safer to put an end to it. If your right eye will cause you to sin, it is better to remove it is an axiom credited to Jesus Christ.

Sending the child to hawk wares is another factor which exposes her to sexual assault. Many mothers go berserk when their children come back home without emptying their wares and to avoid their wrath, they sell their bodies too. I am aware that many families experience abject penury but this does not justify the reason for subjecting the female child to damaging measures.

Indulging every demand or request of the child is not helpful. The child, for instance, should not be bought tight-fitting clothes or clothes that expose her private parts. These make her susceptible to sexual assault. She should also not be allowed to leave the house or come back at odd hours. When she has grown to a certain age of maturity she should not be allowed to sleep in the same room with her parents. This will keep her in the dark on what transpires between the couple at special hours.

*Ijeoma, a public affairs analyst, wrote from Sapele, Delta State.