By Wole Soyinka
I shall
begin on a morbid note. One of the horror stories that emerged from the Daesh
(Isis) controlled parts of Iraq was the gruesome tale of the mother who had a
daughter affected by wanderlust, even in that endangered zone. One day, when
she looked for her to attend to some home chores, she found that she had gone
missing yet again. As she searched, she shouted in frustration: “As Allah is my witness, I’ll kill that girl
when I catch up with her”. A neighbour overheard and reported her to the
Hisbah. The mother was summoned by the mullahs who ordered her to put the child
to death, since she had sworn by Allah. She refused, so they took the child by
the legs and smashed her head against a wall. End of story. True or false? It
certainly was published as true testimony.
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| *Wole Soyinka |
That is all
I have to say to the “literalists”
who obsess over a time scheme of their own assessment. Thus, failure to have
torn my Green Card “the moment” that I learnt that Mr. Donald Trump had won the
presidential elections of the USA.
It did not matter what I was doing at the time – teaching, eating, swimming,
praying, under the shower or whatever. Or a family member saying, “Wait for
me!” – speculatively please, no such disturbance ever took place. If it did
however, I am supposed to contact the Nigerian media – to whom I have never
spoken, and who never contacted me – except one – to beg permission to pursue a
realistic definition of “the moment”. Media fascism is however, a subject for
another day,
For now,
that moment having passed, I must be culpable of breaking a solemn promise. By
the way, since we are on the terrain of literalism, has anyone attempted to “tear”
or rip apart a Green Card? Even a Credit Card? For the average hands, that
would take some doing! I have actually considered garden shears for a dramatic
resolution, this being closer to my real profession.
I have been
asked several times – interestingly only by the foreign media, with the exception
of THE
INTERVIEW – whether indeed I did make such a statement at any time, and
whether I still intended to carry it out, and the answer remains a categorical ‘Yes’.
Not recently, mind you, nor, in the inaccurate blazing PUNCH headline of
Thursday Nov. 16 , but in the accurate wording that is contained in the actual
story on page 9. So, where and when did I first notably make that declaration.
Answer: Addressing a group of students at Oxford University
and fielding questions. It was NOT a public lecture. I have never summoned a
press conference on the issue. The organizers did not invite the (unregistered)
Association of Nigerian Internet
habituees. It was the accustomed student seminar format that moved from the
light-hearted to the serious, the ridiculous and (hopefully) the profound and
back again. I even used the encounter to compare my threat with the public
antics of a former president – unnamed, I assure you – who tore up his party
membership card of a moribund ruling party. Whatever my failings, I do not lack
originality, and I was not about to be find myself indebted to that
contumacious general!
Nonetheless,
did I mean what I said – that is, ‘exiting’ the USA? Absolutely, and that is the
very theme of this address. It will not attempt to deal with the notion of an
exit time-table as conceived by others, as if even the incumbent US president
and his replacement are not even permitted over two months to pack their bags
and prepare to move in and out of the White House, but must exchange positions
the very moment that a winner was proclaimed. Anyone would think that the
Brexit Vote made it imperative for the Brits to plunge into the English Channel instantly, instead of negotiating two
years for an orderly withdrawal. Plebians like me of course need far less time,
nevertheless they do not uproot overnight. Any other proposition speaks of a
permanent agenda, of frustration and hidden histories – such as opportunities
to rehabilitate themselves in the public eye. There is also recession in the
land, and I can understand the psychology of impotence and thus, transferred
aggression. Let it be understood – before I move even one word further – that I
interrupted my present commitment in the United States solely for an urgent
meeting with the Ooni of Ife on an ongoing project. I am obliged to return to
the US
in a matter of two or three days to complete my interrupted mission.
Fortunately, that mission is guaranteed to end long before the United States
becomes Trumpland Real Estate.
