By Ugochukwu Ejinkeonye
If you are in Nigeria and you have not done this
before, try and do it right away. Just open a Nigerian newspaper near you. Go
through its pages to find out how many people were described in that particular
edition as “credible” politicians or “honest and selfless” Nigerians. You
would be shocked to see the number of people that recklessly allowed themselves
to be associated with such superb qualities even when they are fully aware that
by what most people know about their character and vile history, it might even
be considered a generous compliment to dress them up in the very opposites of
those terms.
*Leaders of the PDP and the APC meet before
the 2015 elections in Nigeria
Indeed, these are some of the words and phrases that have
been so callously and horribly subjected to the worst kinds of abuses in Nigeria with
hardly anyone making any attempt to intervene. I won’t in the least, therefore,
be surprised if I wake up tomorrow to hear that decent people in this country
(or even outside the country) have begun to protest and resist any attempt to
associate them with those terms any more.
In these parts, we appear to be such exceptional experts
in the effective devaluation of all that ought to inspire awe and noble
feelings. I can confidently predict that there are now some Nigerians who would,
for instance, feel greatly insulted should their dogs be nominated for our
country’s “National Honours.” Especially, since the Obasanjo regime, the
“National Honours List” in this country has sadly distinguished itself by the
ease with which people who ought to be in jail star prominently in it.
And as you look at the haggard or even dilapidated and grossly
impoverished nature of a country with a long list of “illustrious” and “honest”
sons and daughters annually honoured for their “selfless” and “invaluable”
services to their fatherland, you cannot help wondering how indeed their
so-called “immense contributions to the growth and progress of the their
country” were not able to leave some bit of positive impact on the same country
and its people. Why is a country with
such a long and intimidating list of “patriotic achievers” and “nation
builders” still one of the most backward in the world despite being endowed
with enviably abundant natural resources?
Many Nigerians, especially, politicians, do not care about
the credibility of their pronouncements before they open their mouths to drop
them, especially, before mammoth crowds. It is in Nigeria that a very tall man
would not have the slightest hint of restraint telling everyone how incredibly
short he is (because of the rich gains such a gross misrepresentation would attract
to him at that time) without bothering about the evidence before everybody’s
eyes which brutally contradicts what he is saying. We live in a country where
consequences hardly follow actions, so, people everywhere flaunt their ability
to behave anyhow and make wild claims with utmost impunity.
Now, I feel very highly insulted each time I see a public
officer, say a Nigerian governor, who virtually everyone seems to agree
deserves to head straight to jail once he leaves office due to his mindless
plunder of the country’s resources, come out (before an election) to tell the
world with sickening brazenness how his party would wage a successful war
against corruption if elected into power! By allowing himself the revolting
recklessness of uttering such an outstanding blasphemy, the person is only
calling all of us fools who are incapable of using our brains. And the mere
fact that this same odious fellow would automatically be rewarded with very
ecstatic ovations from supposedly rational human beings who constitute his
audience and who would also go ahead to give him their votes is one reason most
people easily conclude that something is very horribly and disastrously wrong
with Nigeria, and that we live in one of the most unserious societies on
earth.
In Nigeria,
anybody can suddenly become an “esteemed” and “respected “anti-corruption”
crusader. Even if you have a very horrible criminal past, it would not matter.
Somebody once boasted to me that the only way to effect lasting, positive
change in Nigeria is to become a public officer, acquire boundless wealth by
looting the treasury pale, and then with your enormous loot, seek to sanitize
the system. Moreover, Nigerians are always interested in the present. The same
Nigerians who had called you horrible names while you were busy criminally
accumulating humongous wealth would start hailing you once you start attacking the
incumbent regime. Soon, you will be crowned an “eminent statesman” or even the
“conscience of the nation,” celebrated by all.
Even the foreign media which will not tolerate such
hideousness in their own land will join their local counterparts to decorate
you. And if the current government attempts to investigate the organized
banditry you effectively supervised during your tenure, you would just call a
press conference and grant lengthy interviews to allege that they are
persecuting you because you are exposing their corrupt acts and then promise
Nigerians that you would not be deterred by any acts aimed at intimidating you
into silence! I can assure you that if you act “wisely,” you would get eager
influential defenders in the media, among opinion moulders and even from some of
your “more liberal comrades” in the human rights community.
You can also always rely on our media to never attempt to
remember your past, but to continue to emphasize how you are the hope of the
country. They will readily help our nice and easily forgiving and forgetting populace
to quickly consign your past to the bin and embrace your new “Mr.
Clean” image.
Former president of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA),
late Alao Aka-Bashorun, one of the country’s most principled activists and
legal luminaries, once said that if a gang of armed robbers rose in Nigeria and
seized power that he knew some of his colleagues who would fall over themselves
to “serve” in that regime and blame patriotism for their abominable choice.
Aka-Bashorun made this statement during the heyday of military rule when coups
and counter-coups were the country’s worst afflictions, and military
adventurists, largely motivated by selfish interests, did not seek the mandate
of the people to rule them, but just seized power and imposed themselves on all
of us.